There’s a reason salespeople are trained to smile. Why politicians tell personal stories. Why brands pay influencers who feel approachable and relatable. It’s not just charm—it’s science. Liking bias explains why we’re much more likely to agree, comply, or say yes to people we like.
🧠 How Liking Bias Works (and Why It’s So Effective)
What makes someone likable isn’t just their appearance. It’s about feeling similar to them, seeing them often enough to feel familiar, receiving genuine compliments, and associating them with things we already love. It’s about feeling similar to them, seeing them often enough to feel familiar, receiving genuine compliments, and associating them with things we already love.
Robert Cialdini’s famous study of Tupperware parties showed something fascinating – people weren’t buying plastic containers for their features. They bought because their friend, the host, asked them to. It wasn’t logic closing the sale; it was relationship.
🤝 The Science Behind Why We Trust the People We Like
The “What is Beautiful Is Good” study revealed how participants assumed attractive people were smarter and kinder without any evidence. This bias even affects courtrooms, where jurors give lighter sentences to attractive defendants. This is also called the ‘halo effect
Research on negotiations showed that just finding small similarities with your counterpart leads to better deals for everyone. When we like someone, our guard drops, making us more open and less critical.
🛑 When Liking Bias Gets Risky
This bias can trip us up, especially at work. We might hire someone because they feel familiar rather than being best qualified. We might go easier on employees we like when giving feedback. Most concerning, we might miss serious red flags because we click with someone’s personality instead of scrutinizing their ideas.
Sometimes we bias our own choices simply because we’re drawn to people who validate our worldview.
🧭 How to Spot It Before It Sways You
You can’t ignore likability entirely, but you can keep it in check. Before making important decisions, pause and consider: Would you make the same choice if you didn’t enjoy this person’s company? Are you judging their ideas or just their personality? What actual evidence are you using beyond your feelings?
Using structured ways to evaluate things, like getting different perspectives or having clear criteria, helps separate merit from the warm fuzz of liking.
Liking makes life smoother—no doubt about that. But when it becomes the main reason for our choices rather than just one factor, it can lead us away from decisions we’d make if we were really paying attention.
Can you think of a time when liking someone swayed your decision more than logic did?